the head is SPINNING
this is for me to let it all out...move stuff drop it off go to jobs pay nothing feel good feel bad feel important feel shitty lose job lose money have not much have everything--have friends and love.
meet one, two, three nice boys? [getting away with being self absorbed. doesn't sit well] rake the city for a house--did i mention lose apt? live out of car--can't find a house. sleep on one, two, three new beds. feel tepid. feel FEVERISH. sing in car--it's free--new job. work ass off, play the game, feel....whole.
at least for today.
i am CERTAIN tomorrow will be different. is that up to me?
time for me to meet mr perfect...mr merlot, in that case.
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